dear blog

my day is bad…..of course yesterday was a mess up because I can’t control my feelings….I just explode….but I do that within myself and I don’t tell anyone….. 😦 I just…..want to disappear… I have nothing to do on this Earth….my life is messed up… I’m stupid, I will never be able to do something on my own….why bother to live on….why spend more money….why be the black sheep of the family….if this week is not going to be O.K. at least….then I say GOODBYE to everyone who knew me and have a nice life. I don’t wanna go on like this…..I feel like an intruder….in my own skin….I feel left outside… I feel….unworthy of having this life….I just wanna cry till I dry myself out of tears and then I become ashes….and then the wind takes me far away…..can I? can I? can I? pwetty pwease….. I want to become ashes….. I have no right, no purpose, no nothing to be living on this CURSED earth….:)

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