Unhappy Valentine’s Day

The title says it all…   I wish I have never been born…  I’m sick and tired of this stupid shit called life and love? No shit, there is no such thing as love, only SEX!!! Cause that’s all that matters in this stupid world these days!!! But why should I care? I have my own little world… Where anyone can love me and I can love anyone without boundaries… Yet I long for someone to understand me. Unfortunately that person is nowhere to be found, not to my vicinity anyway….

Still, why am I crying like an idiot? For a dickhead? Who only knows how to manipulate me and lie to me, and hold me against the wall while having someone else in mind and loving someone else. Why do I let him do this to me? Why am I so stupid? Why am I feeling abused and used and ripped apart, though nothing’s wrong with me physically…only my mind knows what I am going through now… I wish I were dead. Well, it’s ok. I have always been alone on occasions like this. New Year, Christmas, Easter, whatever. I am not from this world. I don’t deserve anything…

FUCK IT!!!! I AM NOT WORTHLESS!!! THEY ARE WORTHLESS AND THEY DESERVE NOTHING FROM ME! NOT EVEN ONE LOOK, NOT EVEN THE SPIT FROM MY MOUTH! I SHOULD NOT FEEL THIS WAY! I AM BEAUTIFUL, SMART, INTELLIGENT AND I KNOW HOW TO HAVE FUN WITH THOSE WHO ARE MY FRIENDS AND THOSE WHO ACCEPT AS I AM!!!

I am not going to stay here, cry like an idiot and feel sorry for myself. I will rise, prepare myself for a special one night just for me and I will not give a crap about what’s happening around me!!! This is not going to end in tears, I will not let myself cry to sleep. Not for a dick, not for a bitch, not for anyone, because NOBODY deserves to cry for. I am strong, powerful and I will have a night to remember. It has no meaning to me as a Valentine or shit like that. Today is Thursday, the 14th of February and I will …..see about it… 🙂

UNHAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY!

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